WHEN MEN GET TOGETHER ...
Often when men get together they talk about sport or various forms of physical challenge. When the conversation turns to women and sex, my experience in conventional social circles has been that these topics are either avoided or strictly contained within pretty narrow traditional perspectives.
It was my pleasure to spend last weekend having a very different kind of experience with a beautiful group of men, who showed up ready to play full out at our masculine empowerment retreat.
These guys showed immense courage, vulnerability and honesty, sharing the parts of themselves that most people hide out of shame or guilt. We combined that with a healthy spirit of fun and playfulness through the whole experience.
Torrential rain the whole weekend enlivened our spirits rather than dampening them, despite soaked camping gear. We gazed into each other’s eyes in silence, took ice baths, roared, wrestled, swam in billabongs, listened deeply to and challenged each other with powerful questions, drummed, sang, processed through deep coaching, and formed strong bonds of connection.
It was so fucking beautiful to witness and be part of the magic of brotherhood. When men come together in a container of trust and safety, they open up to each other to a level of depth that they otherwise wouldn’t.
And the results speak for themselves. Men going home to partners who are blown away by the changes in their presence and being; long-standing patterns of avoidance confronted and addressed; cocks connected with hearts; a broader perspective of their sexuality and potential as sexual beings; and a deeper understanding of what’s going on in their own romantic lives, including next steps for growth.
For me, one of the biggest things I came away with personally was feeling more strongly than ever that men today are yearning to open up and share of themselves with other men in this way. They just need the opportunity and motivation to do so.
I really appreciate the challenge men face in reaching out for support around their masculinity, sexuality, and relationships with women.
I had a message from a man recently who let me know that he really wants to engage with me and my work, but he’s concerned about friends and business colleagues seeing if he engages publicly with my social media sharing and offerings. And he said many men are probably in the same boat.
I really appreciated his message and asked a bunch of my peers about how to respond to this challenge that men face. Out of this conversation, I’ve decided to open up a private FB group for men and offer a free fortnightly group coaching webinar for men to connect with each other and engage with the work I’m doing in a confidential setting. Keep your eyes out for more details on these coming soon.
I do want to express that IMO it’s a sign of strength to seek support in these areas, not a weakness. All the men I know who have their shit sorted around life purpose, sex, and women, had mentors of their own who they benefited from enormously.
Most of us didn’t have the role models we wanted in our upbringing. Well, be the role model that you wished you had as a young man, and seek the support you need to step into that vision of yourself.
I want to thank and honour the guys who attended last weekend’s retreat and pushed their edge in a big way. These experiences are fucking intense. They’re high flame retreats designed to take men deep, shift areas of stuckness, and send them out brighter and lighter than they came in.
I also want to thank the women who gave of themselves so powerfully and willingly to support the men on Sunday.